Back in June I signed up to be a lab rat for a two-year study called CALERIE.
I took the red line and on it was an ad that had in big, bold letters “HEALTHY AGING”. I thought, hey, I’d like to age healthily. In smaller type it said something about reducing calories to be healthier. I thought, hey, I could probably stand to eat less calories. Then I read what the requirements were for being a part of it (be fit, be not too old and not too young) and thought, hey, I fit those requirements. So I called. Weird, right? You don’t know the half of it, but you will if you read on. I never thought I’d be part of a study, let alone one that’s two years long. Okay, so I can drop out any time I want, so that’s nice. But there are lots of perks to staying in it:
- Free nutritional counseling
- They pay me to lose weight, something I’ve been threatening to do for a while
- I learn lots of cool stuff about myself that I wouldn’t otherwise
Here’s what’s happened since June:
I went through a screening process where they made me fill out lots of questionnaires. One section actually asked if I see halos or auras around people’s heads. This is not an exaggeration. The researcher asked how I was doing just at that moment and I asked him why they didn’t just outright ask me if I was nuts. Apparently they have to weed people out as some do, indeed, believe they see halos and/or auras around people’s heads.
Other parts of the screening consisted of keeping a fairly intensive food log (heretofore known as flog) where everything was recorded. I didn’t have to record calories/fat/protein. Instead I had to record size/portion of every ingredient of food I was eating. Not so bad if you eat at home all the time. I don’t. They gave me a little chart that makes it easier to measure pie-shaped and round things. It was a help, but I can’t say it didn’t attract attention at the dinner table.
They took my blood and my pee and checked my bone density. I’m a very healthy gal.
So then I got in and the baseline began for pretty much all of August. Baseline testing is used to see where the lab rat is starting from. Keep in mind at this point I didn’t know whether I was going to be in the control group (1/3 of the group just eats normally) or the calorie restricted group (the group I wanted to get into). I didn’t find out until just about a week or so ago. August consisted of doing lots more tests for baseline. They measure everything twice. I continued a flog and a weight log. They gave me a scale and calcium pills and a multivitamin and sent me on my way.
The final few days I spent at the facility, which is pretty much a mix between a hotel and a hospital. Not too shabby. I kept myself occupied with Hulu in the evenings, as well as a few visitors, which was nice. Both mornings I had to put my head in a plastic bubble* so that the smart people could test my resting metabolic rate. Try staying awake and looking/hearing nothing for 40 minutes. Go on, try it. I’ll wait.
Okay, done? Great. You fell asleep, didn’t you. Yeah, me too. That’s not great for the test but barring putting a math problem on the ceiling, I’m not sure what could have kept me awake.
The final morning I showered and changed and awaited the results. CR or control group? Turns out I’m in CR! The nutritionist was thrilled. I couldn’t tell if it was because my flogs were so rockin’ (I can be a bit OCD when I’m committed to something) or if she thought I could stand to lose a few. Or maybe she just knew I wanted to do it and she was happy for me.
So, I’m in! But wait, what does that mean? It means that for one month, they feed me and I don’t feed myself. That’s right, no booze, no starbucks, no birthday cake, nada. It’s only a month, how bad could it be? Well, probably worse for the people around me. Maybe. Maybe I won’t be as cranky as we’re all predicting. I’ll do my best, I promise. But before then I’ve got a trip to California and a vegetarian wedding I refuse to miss. So, September 23rd is the fateful day when quite possibly a whole new me could begin. I say this because apparently CR is a movement. I had no idea until someone told me after I’d begun this process.
After that first month, I’ll feed myself, but with the guidance of the nutritionist. I stumbled on Hungry Girl, an awesome book and fun website, which I think will help a lot. Except I’m not down with the artificial stuff, so I may try stevia.
So what I’m hoping to do here is to document my adventures in this study here. To write about the food issues, the study itself, the mind games, the support I get or don’t get from people and maybe MAYBE show pictures. I haven’t completely ruled it out, … a friend is asking for those. Maybe once it’s all said and done I’ll publish them.
Here’s to living longer on less food. Hmmm.
*That picture isn’t me. Sorry, guys.
